This leads me to Jessica's Guide to Dating on the Dark Side by Beth Fantaskey. This is the summary in three words: IT IS HORRIBLE. This book is less than good because the foundation and agreed upon rules of being a vampire have been destroyed in this book.
The book starts with the same typical high school girl. She is crushing on Jake Zinn a muscled farm boy from school located in Lebanon, Pennsylvania. Then of course a mysterious Romanian boy named Lucius Vladescu arrives at the school, the same creepy guy who was staring at Jessica from across the road right before she took her yellow bus to school. It is later revealed to Jessica that Lucius is her betrothed and that she is a Romanian vampire princess. Before this Jessica knew she had been adopted by her American parents from her Romanian parents because her biological parents had been destroyed by angry villagers because they were vampires.However, Jessica whose real name is Antanasia Dragomir has refused to believe that her parents could be vampires and only believes in what is true scientifically which is why her obsession is math and she is a mathlete. Anyway there is a pact between the Dragomirs and the Vladescus as they agreed that Antanasia would be made a vampire and married to Lucius on her eighteenth birthday. Jessica hates Lucius and refuses but Lucius stays to convince her.
Jessica rides horses as she lives in a farm with her vegan parents. coincidence of all coincidences Lucius also rides horses. They both enter into a competition along with the popular cheerleader Faith Cross who wants Lucius.Jessica gets jealous and wants Lucius back but Lucius stays with Faith because he deduces that his evil uncle only wants to bring Jessica back to Romania so he can kill her and rule both families. So Lucius stays with Faith to distance himself from Jessica and spare her life.
Now we are getting to the part where this book gets ridiculous. Lucius gets injured by his horse and is healed by a Hungarian doctor, get this, in a week.WHUAT?! What vampire takes so long to be healed. Another thing is Jessica asks, if i am a vampire how come i don't have fangs or any desire to drink blood? Yeah Lucius we would like to know. Well Jessica you only become a vampire until I bite you but as you approach your eighteenth birthday you will feel your gums begin to ache and so forth.REALLY?! Another horrible thing is that Lucius has a heartbeat. A HEARTBEAT PEOPLE! again WHUAT?! We have all agreed that the definition of a vampire is that they are undead, thus they don t have a heart beat and that's why they need blood. Now if you do have a heartbeat why do you need blood? Well the author didn't deem it fit to tell us so we go on.
In the beginning Jessica asks Lucius why it is so great to be a vampire? Yes Lucius I am literally dying to hear it (like I want to drive a stake in my heart myself from this inconsistent answer). Well Jessica being a vampire is awesome because we can hypnotize people, we have super strength, we can read peoples mind and we have super speed. Wow Lucius I'm impressed I really am. But in the whole book he didn't use not one of his powers.Later he refused to honor the pact and his family of VAMPIRES beat him up as in physically as in a warning? I don't know it was bizarre. Vampires don't beat each other they KILL each other. This book is a disaster.
Next Lucius got beat up by a few jocks for going out with Faith, i don't have to tell you what's wrong with this sentence. Then he went back to Romania letting Jessica think that he died. Jessica then goes to Romania and finds out that her family's property is broke and they open their castle to tourist four days a week. Was this supposed to be funny? then funniest of all the older vampires actually look old yet they still have eternity. At this point I was so angry I threw the book somewhere. How can vampires look old but still live for eternity? This book was horrible and I think the author slept with the publisher and distracted him from reading the book because this is the worst book I have ever read in my life. Even worse than Sandra Brown's Beauty in which the protagonist dies leaving her disfigured husband to hate their daughter.
Bottom line: This book has defiled the vampire myth and it is a horrible piece of literature but amidst all this the Twilight haters would probably say they loved this book just for spite.
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